changes.

i set the bn class pic for racial harmony as my comp wallpaper.
then i look at the picture. everyone has changed.
jiahe has grown taller by a lot. look at the picture that he is standing beside jianfeng.
like a dwarf standing beside a normal human being.
then yen become slimmer.
lotsa people changed their hairstyles.
but it is not tonly the physical aspect that has changed.
sont you think that everyone looked happier in the past?
now. there is just a sad , tired look in everyones face.
they all have all their own problems to face.
then i just feel that everyone is suddenly very pissed off by everything and everyone.
why?
i justwanna know why?
for unknown reasons, or maybe only reasons only known to myself, i am also becoming like that.
i just want everyone to revert back to their old, cheery self
when laughing and smiling were so true and natural.
so many things have happened in the past year, and many of us do not know how to deal with it.
im like almost crying now.
Is it so easy to have things happen in a span of 1 year?
like people suddenly change, and now you see them as your friend, the next minute they start saying bad things about you behind your back.
why not when we have racial harmony this year, we see the differences in the sitting arrangement.
theres sure to be a big change.
the tired smiles appear.
the unnatural smiles that people put out just for the camera.
the glint in their eyes gone.
you know that you actually do not smile with your mouth or your teeth, but your eyes?
yes. your eyes can smile.
then i suddenly think that i am so fake.
acting like some very nice person when i actually am not.
i feel really unnatural around people. like i dont like to be silent cos i feel weird then when i try to talk to other people, the words coming out all seems so fake.
like F-A-K-E with capitals.
i want to be real for a change, but i just cant seem to.
well . FUCK the world.
i sorta hate it.
and anyway dun talk about my blog posts in real life to me .
i will not answer.
anything on my tagboard please.
but i dun think anyone will even bother to tag.
so i decided to maybe stop this blog and continue another one on my own .
one that i can put my true feelings without hurting other people and not having to worry about writing something wrong.